Effective Leadership Requires Clarity in Communication

 Effective Leadership Requires

Clarity in Communication

Are you an Introverted or Extroverted Communicator?

“She always interrupts me right as I am beginning to speak?”

Why doesn’t he share any ideas at our brainstorming sessions?”

“I can’t think straight, she is always talking.”

“He never appears interested in what I am saying.”

“I can’t tell what she is really trying to say.”

 “What is there to think about, let’s jump in and get started on the project?”

These are just a few of the thoughts you will experience and hear from others when people don’t have clarity in the two processes that they use to focus their attention and gather their energy.  The introverted and extroverted thinkers each have their own unique way of interacting with the world and processing information.  Understanding the difference between these two styles will help you lead, influence, communicate, collaborate, and negotiate business more effectively.  Plus it will turn your leadership style into a communication style that others will be more receptive and attracted to.  Effective communication is the ability to be able to see, feel and hear during each conversational situation through the eyes of others without judgment or prejudice.

The actual ratio based on the first official random sample by the Myers-Briggs organization in 1998 showed Introverts 50.7% and Extroverts 49.3% of the USA.

49.3% of the world prefers extroverted thinking. These individuals’ focus on and are stimulated by their external environment and the people, things, and activities around them. They love to have the freedom to talk their ideas out loud with others. 

Introverted thinking makes up the other 50.7% of the population.  They also enjoy the external world but become over stimulated more easily and prefer to focus inward and gather their energy when having time alone to reflect on ideas.

So how can this knowledge be used to improve our communication?

It is common for introverts and extroverts to have issues when they interact.  An extrovert may view an introvert as arrogant, a loner, quiet, uninterested or unresponsive.  An introvert may view an extrovert as overbearing, pushy, loud, and dominating.  

Introverts and Extroverts can live in beautiful harmony.

Effective communication is best achieved when we honor both introverts and extroverts, no matter which type we possess.  How is that done?  I have ten suggestions to help you get started.

10 Ways to Include Introverts & Extroverts in your Communication

1.     When communicating information about meetings, trainings, etc. include all the specifics.  When, where, why, how long, the agenda in chronological order of topics that will be discussed, what to expect.  The introverted thinker will read over the agenda completely, think about what is expected of them and show up prepared, be engaged and will share their best ideas. The extroverted thinker will glance over the agenda, rely on their ability to think and respond spontaneously and will show up prepared, be engaged and share their best ideas.

2.     Have a system in place at your meetings that encourages participation. Have a vase in the middle of the table filled with pencils.  After each person shares their thoughts around a topic, have them take a pencil and hold it in their hand.  They can’t share again until everyone is holding a pencil. That will give introverts an uninterrupted space to share and encourage extroverts to think before speaking.

3.     A possible solution that will allow more time for an introvert to respond is to have appropriate questions ready to ask during the conversation.  That will allow them a little extra time to process during the conversation.

4.     To not feel pressured, introverts may want to include in their conversations.  “I need more time to think about that.  Can I get back to you later today?”

5.     LIGHT BULB: Teaming up an extrovert with an introvert can be a powerful combination.

6.     Notice body language.  Is the person you are communicating with leaning forward – backward? Do they look perplexed or engaged? Do they follow your lead or keep changing the pace with their own nonverbal communication?

7.     Ask the person you are communicating with how they like to receive their information.  Are the visual or auditory?  Do they prefer 1-2-1 attention or group brainstorming?  Set them up for success!

8.     Ask for feedback to be submitted at a later time – giving everyone appropriate time to prepare.

9.     Mix up the dynamics of the team – make sure to include an equal number of extroverts and introverts.

10. Notice communication nuances and make that an every day part of your life.  It will create an atmosphere of community, openness, appreciation, success and progress.

Embrace the process and have fun!

These are just a few of the many ways to incorporate both thinking processes in effective communication. Please leave a comment on how you have used or are going to honor both introverted and extroverted thinking in your communication.  I would love to add your success story to my leadership training.

Inspiration Every Month of the Year!

Inspiration Every Month of the Year!

The 3 J's to a JOYFUL January.....

1. Jazz-Up your career by creating a heart-felt, action specific marketing plan and then back it up with your unstoppable attitude.

2. Jubilantly celebrate and appreciate how far you have come EVERY day and go after your 2015 goals with confidence and passion.

3. Journal your journey. Notice how you feel every step of the way.  Are there any limiting beliefs standing in your way? If so.....Document, then Demolish them!

The 3 F's to a FAMOUS February.....

1. Fine-Tune all of your systems and processes.  Be ready for the unexpected.

2. Fire-UP your positive spirit and look at each detour as an opportunity.

3. Faithfully evaluate your life-purpose every quarter. Does it support your values and beliefs?

The 3 M's to a MAGICAL March.....

1. iMagine how completing a series of tasks toward a goal will impact your life.

2. Make the Move to stop putting out fires and instead prioritize your time. 

3. Motivate others by using words of wisdom that encourage success.

The 3 A's to an ABUNDANT April.....

1. Awaken your senses, appreciate your life and celebrate your successes!

2. Adhere to your most important values - without exception!

3. Analyze your communication style - use visionary words of wisdom that encourage success.

The 3 M's to a MAGNIFICENT May.....

1. Be mesmerized by your greatness!

2. Map-out every detail of your best life - and go LIVE it! 

3. Mirror your true needs and beliefs in your communication.

The 3 J's to a JAZZY June.....

1. Joyfully share your gifts!        

2. Jump out of bed each morning and gratefully embrace your day!

3. Jam your mind with positive thoughts!

The 3 J's to a JUBILANT July.....

1. Jumpstart your July by setting an AUDACIOUS Goal. Identify two steps that you will accomplish THIS MONTH.       

2. Jumble up your thinking and look at your dream from a different perspective and then make a BOLD move.

3. Jockey your schedule around until you are only blocking time to do the things that are most important to you and your dream.

The 3 A's to an AUDACIOUS August.....

1. Act as if you are already where you want to be. That means thinking like, talking like, dressing like, and feeling like the person you will become after you have achieved your goals.

2. Annihilate your negative thinking - replace it with a strong visualization of what you would rather believe.

3. Adorn your life with the people that you love to be with.

The 3 S’s to a STUPENDOUS September…..

1. Successes from January through August need to be appreciated and celebrated.

2. Stop and Evaluate and update the goals you set at the beginning of the year.

3. Share why you do what you do!  Review all the avenues you use to share why and what we do.  Is your message and brand consistent and uniquely inspiring?

The 3 O’s to an OUTSTANDING October…..

1. Organize what is most important to you by identifying your Top 10 Values.  Design goals around your values and align your life and business according to them. 

2. Step OUT of your shoes and into the shoes of your future. Are you focusing on the things that will take you to where you truly want to be in life?

3. Optimize your Appreciation....watch the sun rise...smell a flower...experience each stroke inside your favorite painting. 

The 3 N's to a NOTABLE November.....

1. Nourish your mind with inspirational music and people.

2. Notify your fears that you are breaking-through your comfort zone and bursting into your greatness!

3. Nuzzle-up in a wool blanket, curl up in your favorite chair and visualize your brightest dream -- from inception through fruition.

The 3 D's to a DAZZLING December.....

1. Delight in the beauty behind the reason for the season.

2. Devote time to contemplate whether you are honoring and featuring your special gifts in your business and life.
3. Dream BIG and map out an action plan for the New Year and share it with two people.

Tap Into Your Values and Discover Your Life Purpose

Tap Into Your Values and Discover Your Life Purpose

“The purpose of life is a life of purpose.” ~Robin Sharma

What Most People Want to Know:

Many of my clients ask, “ How will I know when I am living my life purpose?”  Or “How do I find my life purpose?”

My response:

Knowing your life purpose means that you’ve discovered what is most important to you and you are living it and celebrating it every day of your life.  And if you don’t honor what’s most important to you, you will wander here and then wander there choosing the priorities of others and supporting their dreams instead of your own. You may experience a deep loss of direction, leaving you uninspired and unfulfilled.  You may continuously search for the thing that you believe is meant to fill you up and make you happy.  This mindset may cause you to switch jobs, look for a new partner, buy a new car or move to a new location - because you are in a constant search for happiness.  In the end though, you will discover what you are searching for is something that is already within you, lying in waiting, and not apparent until you tap into your values and identify what is most important to YOU!

Then they ask:

“How do I figure out what’s most important to me?”  I then share my five steps that help tap into life purpose.

5 Steps to Help You Tap Into Your Life Purpose:

1. The first step is to get to know you - inside and out.  Fall in love with every part of you, how your wonderful mind thinks and interprets events, how you look, who you enjoy spending time with, what things you like to surround yourself with, what environments make you smile, and how you make decisions and communicate - to just name a few.

2. The second step is to determine what your values are specifically. Discover if they are different than what you thought.  Set goals to help you honor them.

3. The third step is to get in touch with your natural talents and personal gifts.  What special gift do you possess that comes so naturally to you that when you do it you completely lose track of time.

4. The fourth Step: Decide how you can use your gift to help others.  Is there a cause that makes your heart cry?  Is there a business you would put yourself out there and not care if you failed and would keep trying because you loved it so much?

5. And finally, most important, what makes you happy, truly HAPPY?  Decide what that is and find a way to go do and be it.

Stop Wondering About and Wandering Around Your Purpose:

Investing time walking through the five steps will stop the wondering and the wandering.  You will know if you are on the right path and can now spend more time relaxing and enjoying your life.  When you are living a life that is supported by your values and gifts you will experience a life of ease, joy, happiness and fulfillment.  Your gifts will help guide you toward the unique way you were meant to benefit others.  And allowing others to experience your special gifts and talents will create your amazing life of significance.

Your Life Matters:          

Most people have a longing to know that their life mattered and they have left their unique mark on the world. With the busyness of life, many of us may become distracted and only capable of focusing on how to just get through the day, never knowing they are living a life that is not aligned with their purpose.

The Question I present to myself every week:  If you knew you only had one year to live, what would you do with each of your days, and what would you want to be remembered for?   I would love to hear how you would answer that question.

DEMOLISH Your Old Way of Thinking and Gain a New Perspective

 DEMOLISH Your Old Way of Thinking 
and Gain a New Perspective

I am BLOWN – Away!  Have you ever experienced a speech that moved your typical way of thinking into a wonderful spiral?  Stretching you – expanding you – testing you?  On May 8^th I watched the live stream event called Leadercast Now.  One of the very first speakers was Andy Stanley.  He blew me away. 

Andy Stanley said this about BOLD Leadership:

“Bold leaders refused to be cowed by how. You can how a great idea right out the door. When people come to you with an idea, say “wow” not “how.”……. “Do not let your calendar or your organization to conspire against you.”

After hearing him speak I was ready to go home. I heard all I needed to hear and I immediately wanted to isolate myself in a room until I came out with the answers to Stanley’s two BOLD Questions:

1. “What do I believe is impossible to do in my field but if it could be done would fundamentally change my business? (Question comes from Joel Barker, 1992, Paradigms)”

2. “What breaks your heart or what would you like people to line up and thank me for when I am old?”

Today, a month later, I am rereading his questions and have been sitting in front of my computer for two hours searching my heart, my brain, and my body for the answer to even one of his two questions.

My daughter is sitting next to me watching a show on her computer, “Game of Thrones” and all of the sudden one of the characters says, “If you want to build a better home you must first demolish the old one.”  I have to admit I have no idea what that show is about - but when I heard the words I found them interesting.  They make me think: I can do that!  I can build a better home by demolishing my old one – in a way.  Instead, I can demolish my old way of thinking and build a new way of thinking.  

In order to do that I decide to step outside of myself, walk across the room and look at myself sitting at my desk, typing away on my computer. 

What do I see from this perspective in my OLD House?

I see a woman that wants to make a difference in a big way.  She is possibly playing too small.  She is hiding behind the fears around her disease. She doesn't believe she will have enough time in her life to reach all of her goals.  Sometimes she chooses an easy way out.  She becomes overwhelmed with being great and doesn't know where to begin. She wavers in her belief in her ability to see her dreams to completion.  She is not sure she deserves to play big.  She has not completely given away fear and embraced faith.

What do I see from this perspective in my NEW House?   

God has given her everything she needs. She loves her life and her business. Her doubts are keeping her from experiencing an abundance of joy, accomplishment and fulfillment. When she chooses to play small she is ignoring people that need her help.  She is open to building a new house.  She wants her house filled with mapped out steps around her most important goals.  She promises to ask for help.  She won’t accept no for an answer when faced with a roadblock in front of her dream.  She knows what is most important to her and she is not afraid to express it. She is ready to approach Stanley’s two questions and not rest until they are answered.  Inside those questions lies the final hurrah to her wonderful life.

All I can say is, OH MY.  I have never looked at myself this way. I challenge you to walk away from your body and watch yourself off at a distance.  What do you see? Write it down and if you feel comfortable, comment below, I’d love to hear from you. It is the most eye opening, enlightening, and somewhat scary exercise I have ever done.